


Rolling with Illumi Zoldyck

by peanut_gallery_ghostwriter



Series: Murderers' Tomfoolery [2]
Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Cuddling, Do not consult hisoka for dosage recs, Ecstasy - Freeform, Hisoka does too, Hisoka is a bad influence, Illumi has unreasonable tolerance to poison/drugs, M/M, Mdma, Molly - Freeform, Recreational Drug Use, and doing drugs!, hisoillu, the murder husbands are back
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-24
Updated: 2020-01-23
Packaged: 2021-02-22 14:16:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,025
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22384213
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/peanut_gallery_ghostwriter/pseuds/peanut_gallery_ghostwriter
Summary: Hisoka wants Illumi to do molly.
Relationships: Hisoka & Illumi Zoldyck, Hisoka/Illumi Zoldyck
Series: Murderers' Tomfoolery [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1611277
Comments: 11
Kudos: 159





	Rolling with Illumi Zoldyck

“Ready?”

“It is 6 o’clock in the morning, Hisoka.”

“You are so right, and?”

“It is too early.”

“Okay, well--this could be fun--consider this: we take some now and then set an alarm for 7.”

Illumi turns over and pulls the covers over his head.

“That way when we wake up we’re already rolling _._ Doesn’t that sound like a good plan?”

“No.”

“Aw.” Hisoka hugs the lump under the blanket. Quietly, he complains, “Illu, I get the feeling you don’t appreciate the trouble I went through to make sure there was enough for you--” 

“That is correct.” _Probably_ because Hisoka’s drug dealer can literally conjure pounds of drugs at the drop of a hat, _and_ Illumi never asked Hisoka to buy him molly. Illumi promptly falls asleep. 

* * *

“What about now?”

“It’s 11,” Illumi struts through their front room with his chic messenger bag. He’s donned his full ‘ _I’m not an assassin, I just slay’_ attire, which is very similar to his assassin attire, but a deeper shade of green. 

“You are so right, and?” Hisoka smarms. He’s sitting on the couch, folding laundry. In contrast to his boyfriend, Hisoka is wearing an oversized t-shirt and lacey boxers, and wears a full face of makeup. He has no plans to go out today, but he wanted to experiment with sparkles. 

Illumi grabs his coat. “It is still too early, and I am going out.” 

“You’re going to the spa. What more perfect an opportunity are you waiting for--”

“I am leaving now.” Illumi slams the door behind himself, and Hisoka continues slowly folding their laundry. The fabrics feel particularly sensational right now. Hisoka chuckles to himself. 

The door cracks open again. 

“You’ve changed your mind,” Hisoka wiggles his eyebrows.

“No, I have not. I came back to ask something: could you iron my slacks again? I would be grateful.”

“Done. They’re in your closet," Hisoka has a twinkle in his eye, or maybe that's just glitter. 

“Oh.” If Illumi could make any other faces than the one he’s making right now, he’d be blushing. “Thank you.” 

* * *

Illumi returns at 2 o’clock to an uncharacteristically quiet apartment. He does a cursory check of the flat using _En,_ and discovers Hisoka curled up not in his own bed, but in Illumi’s--not what he expected. Illumi quietly enters his room and observes:

Hisoka is hidden beneath a pile of pillows, and he’s giggling quietly.

“What are you doing?”

Hisoka pops his face out from under. “Hello darling, come join me--it’s so cozy. You’ll love it.” His makeup has smudged and sparkles are everywhere.

“You are high.”

“ _Oh_ _yes_ , I am very high. Will you please get in here.” The words coming out of Hisoka’s mouth are fairly characteristic, Illumi thinks, but there isn’t a trace of disingenuity in his tone like there usually is. “All I want to do is be with you.” And Hisoka means it. It’s drug-induced, but it’s cute.

“Oh? Well, I am here.” Illumi approaches the foot of his bed. “How much did you take?” 

“A perfect amount,” Hisoka disappears under the pillowfort, and suddenly pops out at the foot of the bed right in front of Illumi. “Don’t you want to join me? I want to hold you--well, I always want to hold you. Sometimes I’ll be in the middle of a fight, and I’ll start thinking about how _you_ might go about fighting my opponent, and then I just wish I was fighting you instead--I’ve wanted to tell you this for a while.”

“Hm.” That’s hardly a secret, Illumi thinks. He stares blankly down at Hisoka and cocks his head to the side.

“I love that look,” Hisoka sighs. Again, Illumi notes, he’s completely sincere. How peculiar.

They stare at each other in silence. So many times, these prolongued shared looks between them lead to fucking or fighting or both, but not right now: Hisoka, lord of fuckery, is radiating synthetic yet genuine affection. Illumi’s brow knits. He knew MDMA made people feel more affectionate, but this is so much more than he thought possible.

“Okay, I will join you now. Do not move.” 

Illumi walks to his closet, grabs a change of clothes, and heads to their Jack and Jill bathroom where he disappears from Hisoka’s line of sight. Moments later, Illumi returns wearing a loose grey t-shirt and briefs. Hisoka’s eyes light up.

“ _Ah._ You look so good--you always look so good.”

“I will need one hundred and forty seven doses if I am to become as high as you are.”

“I’ve got you,” Hisoka disappears underneath the pillows again. This time when he reemerges, he’s holding a small bottle with white pills in it. “Hmm… there were ten. I took a half of one of these this morning, and another half just before you got home, and I feel great, so you should take the rest of them.”

“How much is in one pill?”

“Oh, I forget. But it’s fine, this will be perfect for you.”

“Where is your phone?”

“It’s on your nightstand.”

“What is your dealer’s name?” Illumi picks up Hisoka’s phone and starts scrolling through his contacts. 

“You’ll know when you see it,” Hisoka giggles. He’s not wrong. He has fewer than ten contacts saved.

**_Drug Conjurer_ **

“I see.” Because it’s fun, and because he can, he checks out the other contacts Hisoka has saved in his phone. A couple of them stand out that are both in the ‘M’ section: 

**_My Husband <3’_ **

**_My Queen ;*_ **

Illumi wonders why he’s less than three, but pockets this confusion for later. He taps on the drug dealer’s contact. Illumi searches through their messages for more details, of which there are only a few. 

“Each pill is twenty five doses,” he reads. “So I will take six of them.”

“Alright then, take six of them. And then please come here,” Hisoka pleads. Illumi has half the mind to tease him, but he ultimately joins Hisoka in bed. Hisoka wraps his arms around Illumi’s waist and pulls him tight. Hisoka was right, Illumi thinks: this is so cozy. 

And he isn’t even high yet.

**Author's Note:**

> Find me on Tumblr! (Link in profile)


End file.
